Jacob's they/them pronouns FAQ
- What is this? - When people talk about me I really appreciate it if they use 'they/them' instead of 'he/him' (which my facial hair might incline you use!). This is just a page I made to give explanation, if people want it.
- Why though? - I didn't realise this was an option until the first time I was asked my pronouns at an LGBTQ+ event and I was struck to learn that I can even have a say in these words. I know I feel so much better about myself, and feel like I am being seen as who I really am when gendered language is taken away and so "they/them" has stuck.
- So, are you Non-binary then? - Yep! Binary just describes any system where there are just two options. When I have to use the binary Man/Woman system, like when I fill out a form or someone calls me 'Mister', it always feels a bit rubbish. When I think of myself, it's not in that system, so calling me Non-binary makes sense. I am sometimes worried it will seem like a "Hey look at me!" thing. It's not. It's just an honest way of talking about who I am.
- How though? - "Jacob really made a fool of themselves today" ... "I'm glad Jacob explained it. I understand them a lot better now" ... "He... Oops! I mean, they made a web page which was really helpful"
- What if I get it wrong? - Honestly, I probably won't be there to hear it, and if I do, I'll survive! I've got this far. No need to appologise either. We all just want to be understood. So if you're are listening, and trying, thank you.
- Can I ask you about it? - Sure, but casually. I partially wrote this because I don't want anyone thinking I need a huge number of allowances made for me or to be unecessarily challenged. It's your choice what you do with this request. If you "don't agree with it" or whatever - no one is forcing you, and there is no discussion needed. If you want to just curiously talk to me as a friend about it, I'm fully here for that!
You can read more about Non-binary stuff on Wikipedia and follow the references there for further info.
Thank you! x